Wendy Jo's Life

I show respect to the mother who raised me and taught me the values I hold true. But I also remember you. Also a mother, and whose children are still here and still miss and remember the mother who raised them. We all miss you.

You would be 51 today. You would have come up with me after me being 51 for 9 days.

I tried to reboot my life. I tried to find new structure. I failed. I tried to reconnect with some of my interests. I failed. I’ve tried to be more social. I’ve failed. But, you’re still on my mind.

This year marks another year that I spend both my birthday and Christmas, not only without you, but utterly alone. You brought a certain life to the holidays, especially Christmas. I haven’t even watched any of the Christmas movies this year.

I miss having Thanksgiving with you. But I miss it even more this year because of the pandemic, nobody wants anyone around them. Families are so isolated. Thanksgiving is not the same this year as last year. Once again, I know you would brighten my day if you were here.

With the pandemic isolating everyone and my lack of, not only local family, but friends as well, I’m completely by myself. The few people I thought were there for me have let me down, as usual. It is during these trying times I am reminded of how much we actually lose, when we lose someone special.

…20 years ago! How time flies. How much things have changed since you’ve been gone. When you came into my life you not only changed my life in a positive way, you also made me a better person. Things in life that I struggled with, you helped me overcome. In return, I filled a void in your life as well.

This was supposed to be your day. And I suppose it still is…in a manner of speaking. You’re in my heart and my soul. And you’re certainly in my thoughts…so yeah, it’s still your day. I miss you so much, my love.

…without my one true valentine. I did as you asked. Believe me, I tried. But it’s just not meant to be. I miss you so much.

Your birthday is here…I couldn’t sleep. I think the only consolation I have in your loss is that you are beyond suffering. You are beyond all the negative things in life. You are at peace.